Thursday Evening Open Thread: Bernie Benghazi
As you contemplate your open thread and power hour, enjoy this world of imagination about what would happen if Bernie Sanders had to testify in front of the Benghazi inquisition.
Try imagining Bernie sitting before a rabid bunch of Republicans for 11 hours. First he'd blame someone else. Then he would threaten to sue. Next he'd get surrogates Foghorn Leghorn & Yosemite Sam to speak to the press. When that didn't work, he'd try to change the rules even when he knew the rules going in. After that wasn't effective, he'd resort to gobbledygook as intelligent speech, and of course blame his unpreparedness on the media, which would lead him to outright lying. And his angry white MENions yelled, "Hang the bitch!" What? Oh sorry. That was a whole other thingy.
Where was I? Oh yeah. I remember. When the pressure became too great, he'd jump up, pump his angry fist, and yell, "When I'm president, gay marriage will become legal in every state, there will be a gun in every home as well as a chicken in every pot and pot in every pot and a car in every garage. Oh yeah or a subway token for those who don't drive." After which he'd dramatically turn from the committee and scamper out of the chamber to the nearest microphone and announce, "I am not qualified to be president." All within an hour and a half. Oh, by the way, I was just kidding about the 11 hours.
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