Since Proposition 8 passed by a 52-48 margin in California, stripping gay and lesbian Californians of the right to marry and devastating the lives of countless people by delivering us to second class citizen status, there has been a flurry of spontaneous protests and demonstrations across the country in support of marriage equality. The LGBT and allies community has been responding strongly with just outrage. Grassroots people, on their own efforts, have identified the strongest financial supporters of Prop 8 (I'm looking at you, the Church of Latter Day Saints) from publicly available lists and put them on the Internet for boycotting. It is having at least some effect. Demonstrations and protests have targeted Mormon temples. I say this is exactly what we need. We need to be angry, we need to agitate, and we need to demand our full equality, not ask for it nicely.

But apparently, even some within our own community have a problem. I went to a protest last week at the San Jose City Hall, and a dear friend of mine got up on the steps and urged us not to "blame" anyone in the "faith community". To me, it sounded like she was speaking against singling out the Mormon Church. Whether she meant it that way or not, I know a fair number of people feel that way. I have a clear position on this.

Right before the Prop 8 vote, I had a big fight with one of my friends. He's Indo-American (as am I), he's gay, but he's closeted. His entire family was voting YES on 8. I asked him not to come out but at least to talk to his family about voting. I know straight people who have convinced their families to vote NO. My friend wouldn't even talk to his family about voting NO. Why? He was afraid that his parents would "suspect" something. I was appalled - we are on the verge of losing what took us so long to gain, and you are afraid you'd raise suspicion? You are 23 (my friend is), not a baby. Snap out of your complacency, step out of your comfort zone. He told me I was being ignorant of his situation, that I was stupid, and that asking him to talk to his family about voting NO on 8 is tantamount to asking a Muslim gay man to do the same. The irony was that I know Muslim gay men who had come out. He never talked to his parents or anyone else in the family. His NO vote was drowned out by about 10 other YES votes from members of his immediate and extended families.

And so on election night 2008, amidst Democratic and progressive triumph across the country, California voters passed Proposition 8, a Constitutional Amendment removing the right to marry for same-sex couples. This wasn't just about rights but about dignity, about being able to celebrate our love like the rest of society, about finally not being a second class citizen. But by a narrow 5-point margin, California voters decided that majority (mob) rule should suffice as a substitute for minority rights.